SPEEDY THE GOLDFISH

Written when my daughter was 12.

I bought a goldfish for Susan four years ago, and she has changed the water in the little round fishbowl weekly. So for her birthday this year I got her one of those new-fangled aquariums. Very small - just big enough for one goldfish.

We assembled the aquarium and I found some seashells to put in it instead of the recommended gravel. The fish started turning black. Within a week, he was ready for intensive care. I took a water sample to the closest pet store, which was 1/2 hour away. I came home $30 lighter with ten capsules of medicine for the black fungus growing on the fish, two bottles of something to treat the water with, and a bag of gravel - with strict instructions to get those salt-water seashells out of the tank!

A week later, I took another water sample to the pet store. "How much do you feed this little guy?" the clerk asked. I answered, "Oh, we just throw in a pinch or two of fish food whenever we pass by the tank. The fish loves it. He practically taps on the glass when he sees us coming." The clerk said, "Well, you'll have to stop feeding him so much. One flake of food every day or two is enough."

Another week passed, and I took another water sample. The fish's fungus had cleared up and he was livelier than ever. But the water was still saturated with decaying food. "How often do you change the water?" the clerk asked. "Never!" I replied. "I bought this fancy new aquarium so Susan could stop changing the water." "No good," he said. "Your filter aerates the water, but the food still decays. You'll have to siphon a couple of inches of water out every week and add fresh water."

I came home with a plastic tube and showed Susan how to siphon water. She said she wouldn't suck fish water out of that tank for all the gold in China. So I did it. A week later I took another water sample over to the pet store. The clerk said at the rate I was going I might have the tank water freshened up in oh, say, a year. I'd better break the whole thing down and start over with fresh water. I did it last week, and the fish is lovely. I have to go to the pet store to test this new water today. Anybody want to buy a goldfish - cheap?