POTATO CHIPS AND ONION DIP

Oh give me nothing more in life
Than one small heavenly delight -
To scoop a salty, ruffled chip
Into a pint of onion dip.

Three times a day I would indulge
But I must battle with the bulge;
I really love potato chips
With yummy, creamy onion dip.

In public places I resist
Potato chips and onion dip;
The world would see a different me -
I do not nibble daintily.

But back at home my kitchen holds
The chips, and many tales untold
Of gobbling up potato chips
And lots and lots of onion dip.

I try to stop – I really do;
But just one chip will lead to two;
A body needs a lot of chips
To take care of a pint of dip!

I eat the chips and scrape the dip
Off of the carton’s sides and lick
My greasy, salty fingers then
I reach into the bag again.
When finally the stomach churns
(Though craving in my heart still burns)
I have to force myself to quit
Devouring chips and onion dip.

My husband knows – but he’s no help –
Sometimes he wants some chips himself;
I tell myself I will not slip,
I will not taste one single chip,

I watch him eat them all alone,
And pretty soon my will is gone;
I must have some potato chips
And very fattening onion dip.

Tomorrow will be certain death
With salt parched mouth and onion breath;
That’s when I’ll swear I’ll never sin
And gorge myself like that again.

Yet what in life could ever beat
That yummy, tasty, salty treat?
That wondrous snack that makes me flip -
Potato chips and onion dip.