MAINTENANCE IN WRONG APARTMENT

I took a sleeping pill last night and, to my thrill, it worked!  Problem is, it’s still working.  I almost fell asleep driving – and I did at a traffic light. 

Back home, I opened my eyes enough to see a little pink paper on the counter.  It looked like a pink slip from my college days.  (Not that I did anything wrong in college.)  Was I still asleep?  Had I broken something sleepwalking?  If so, what was I capable of doing while sleepdriving?

Wide awake now, I read it.  Whew!  I’m not getting kicked out of the apartment.  It was a work ticket.  But I hadn’t called maintenance.  I didn’t have anything wrong that needed fixing.  (No comments, please.)

According to the pink slip, they had fixed the dishwasher wheels.  I pondered that.  Where in the world were those wheels, and why did they need fixing?  You can’t roll the thing out.  Then I remembered that the lower rack was so bad that I had to lift it over the big dip before sliding it out.  There’s no way that could be fixed, is there?  I tried it and, sure enough, the rack slid out smoothly. This was truly a dream come true! 

I’ll bet this was the first time the apartment managers ever got a thank you call for sending maintenance to the wrong apartment.

MAKING A RUG

I’m going to do it.  I can’t believe I’ve spent the past 4 ½ hours on the computer looking for an outdoor rug that measures 5’ x 14’ and costs under $100.  Ya gotta dream.

In despair or desperation, or both, I looked up “outdoor fabric.”  God had pity on me because what I needed was the first thing that popped up: “Easy DIY Outdoor Rug.”  I like that word “easy.”

You get some canvas.  (I know what that is.)  Then you get some acrylic paint.  (I have some paint that hasn’t dried up yet.  Not sure it’s outdoor quality, though.)  Then you get some painters tape if you want to make straight stripes, or get stencils, or you can freewheel.  (That’s my style.)  Then you get some caulk to seal the edges.  (Wonder if it would take care of my own frayed edges.)

Tune in next week to hear the result of “doing my own thing.”  Should I use my old paint and hope it’s “outdoor quality”?  It might look like a mosaic if it flakes off.  Hmmm.  That might not be bad.

AT MY DESK TYPING

I just picked up my drink and gulped it down.  Yuck!  Day old Pepsi.  Also on this desk I have a glass of iced tea that is not iced any more.  Where’s the V-8 I just opened?  I get so lost in typing Hugh Mouse stories that I can’t even keep up with what I’m drinking!  I think the Pepsi was to go with my hamburger at lunch yesterday.  And I believe the tea happened when I was brewing a new pitcher after lunch.  After the dryer buzzer called me, a V-8 just sounded good. 

How can I sit here all afternoon typing stories for this blog?  I think it’s because I like to draw the pictures after the stories are finished.  Hugh Mouse is fun to draw in all the situations he gets into.  As an aspiring artist who can never get it right (in my opinion), Hugh is my exclusive claim to fame.  I’m going to keep drawing him the rest of my life.  I’m good at it. 

Right now the artist in me is saying, “You go girl!”  

PUFFED UP CUB REPORTER

In the eighties, I did some reporting for a small county newspaper.  I learned a lot about a lot of subjects.  I was really beginning to feel quite smart, especially one day when I received a nice compliment.  Tom the bartender congratulated me on an article I had written, making some comment about my being the one who has the brains in the family.  My husband graciously smiled about it. 

But you can’t stay on the mountaintop long.  Tom asked me how I wanted my drink – a cocktail or a highball?  My ego was squashed when I had to ask what the difference was.

BIRDS

There’s nothing more beautiful than a bird.  I’m not talking chickens here.  Just pretty birds.  The neighbors in the apartment above us have feeders and their seeds fall between the cracks onto our deck, so as long as I’ve got the clutter I might as well get entice some pretty birds.

I have had bird feeders everywhere I’ve lived, carefully placed where the bird crap wouldn’t get on the porch/deck/patio/whatever.  How can I put a bird feeder on the deck of an apartment?  The two chairs out there would turn white in short order.

I’m going to get a hinge at the hardware store and attach a long rod to it that I can swing in to fill it with seeds and swing out to feed the birds.  This is going to take some thinking. 

Maybe I should just get a finch feeder.  Finches couldn’t have very big bird crap, could they?

I’M RETIRED

For my husband, “I’m retired” means “I don’t have to do that.”  He had a long career and now he is taking full advantage of his golden years. If I say “Let’s go exercise,” he says, “I’m retired.”  If I say “Let’s go to the flea market, he says, “I’m retired.”  If I say, “We really should go to that meeting,” he says, “I’m retired.”  You get my drift.

I’ve caught on.  Unfortunately for him, I’ve retired from housework!